Tuesday 19 July 2011

The euphoria of breaking up for school summer holidays - every day!

This morning I began the day at my parents concerned about a friend. It was good to share some of my 'survival' techniques with someone else who is suffering - different problems but suffering nonetheless. It isn't pleasant to hear pain in someone's voice and you just wish you could click your fingers and take it away for them. Maybe that is how some of you have felt about me? I know my parents do.

I listened, offered advice and some 'small steps' but he hasn't been out of my thoughts all day.

Meanwhile we had the pleasure of baby Sophie! She is now walking and is as adorable as ever. My Mum and Dad are truly amazing with her and she worships them!

My niece Sophie!
I love my Grandma!
I love my Grandpa!
I didn't want to leave but I had to!

I headed back along the M62 to Table Table at Aspley in Huddersfield. I met up with fellow Joanne (Joe) Bingley Memorial Foundation trustee Dinah. We can recommend the Table Table sharing plate. Yummy!

We both went on to present to managers from local Children's Centres to tell them about the charity and to offer our workshops to them. Hopefully some will follow in the autumn. Poor Dinah barely got chance to say her name before I launched in! And didn't stop! Ooops - sorry!

Next stop was round to see Chris who was putting together an impressive 'Call to Action' document around services for postnatal depression - watch this space.

We went to pick up Emily from nursery who was teething and not happy! Fish and chips helped for tea. Is it any wonder that my white jeans are going tight on me again? No - they haven't shrunk! It is some of the stone in weight I had lost since Clive died that is creeping back!

From there I had a taste of peace and serenity! At the Rock the Rectory event last week for Joe's charity, Dinah had been approached by the owner, Stephanie, of a local spa, Eastthorpe Hall, who expressed interest in helping us. She suggested we went along to their Open Evening tonight. Dinah was unable to go so I was happy to. I am so pleased I did! Wow! What a fantastic place. The sense of tranquillity embraces you. Stunning decor, lighting, wallpaper - everything. As I was given a guided tour I must admit I felt quite tearful in a treatment room - it felt such a supreme haven and one I want to experience fully.

I have been invited back in a few weeks - something that I shall utterly look forward to. I was asked yesterday what I would like for my birthday which is coming up. I suggested a new nightie and the Downton Abbey DVDs. I reckon vouchers for Eastthorpe Hall are on the list now!

I have driven home invigorated and excited about the autumn. I no longer have our cruise to look forward to in September but other things are turning up to make me smile.

However, my biggest smile was for a message from my friend with whom the day had begun. He was thanking me and saying that he felt better. We have arranged lunch on Thursday. I am delighted.

I have been away from home for several days. Today I returned happily and no tears - I did make sure I was talking to Clive's sister Lynn (hands-free) though as I arrived back on the drive. That helped! Also that one of my neighbours have cut the front lawn for me again. Whoo hoo!

Life has felt easier today. Why?

  • being with family and friends, or speaking to them
  • helping others
  • arranging events and experiences to look forward to
Can you do any of these things tomorrow?

When I was a teacher I remember the euphoria of breaking up for summer (except there was the dilemma to do the next term's planning the first few days off even though you are exhausted - or leave it until the last week). 

With my new job I am almost sorry to be taking a break! I love my purpose and 'career' now. However, even though I feel much stronger I know I have much healing still to do. I also have our birthdays in early August. 

The strength I feel tonight is very comforting but I cannot wait to sink into our bed!

N nite,

Elaine x

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